the cold reality?
Posted on: Friday, March 27, 2009
Posted at: 10:59 PM



i think this might have been photoshop-ed.
but to me, it looked WAAAAAAYYYYYY COOL.
hahah. it seems like the guy is in control.
& I need to be like that now. DDD:

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry
A past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried
After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
Only in hopes of dreaming
That everything would be like it was before
But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

After all this time
I never thought we'd be here
Never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

After all this why
Would you ever wanna leave it
Maybe you could not believe it
That my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you will ever know
A part of me died when I let you go
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go


another nice song :D
see? it describes a lot of feelings.

i wanna tell this to whoever is reading this,
or whoever can be bothered to read this
actually there is a lot to say. alright, here we go.

1-
i know its difficult to continue on.
but press on! because thats what helps you grow.
perserving is what makes you stronger.
you dont necessary have to be the best,
but as long as you still wanna do something,
and make full use of that something that you wanna do,
go ahead.
i know its difficult, i know, i know.
but dont ever lose that fire in you.
it gets tougher and tougher, but dont ever lose that fire in you.
if it still bothers you, dont give up.
keep going. its only when we make mistakes, that we grow.
there's always people who are so goddamn bitchy to you,
people who are nice to you on the surface but underneath its like a storm.
and there are also people who are truly good to you,
and will stand by you no matter wad.
we may seem heartless and cold and uncaring at times.
but all of us want you to grow up and learn.
it isnt about the end point.
its about the process.
seriously.
no matter what happens, hang in there!
all we can do is the minimize the fall.
so my dear darling, hang in there.

2-
Brother! if you're reading this right,
i wanna tell you sth!
i'm very very very very touched that you set up my instrument for me,
thank you very much.
i know this isnt much to a lot of people.
but to me, its a lot.
come to think of it, you've been super nice to me today.
what happen? conscience bugging u ah?
say go eat buffet after i pass out.
its not the big things that you do for me,
its the small and insignificant ones that add ups to the big ones that counts.

and thank you very much again,
for listening to me everytime.
complain this complain that,
everything also complain to you.
and you'll always always always try to solve for me.
seriously, i'll miss you a lot leh! DDD:
lets enjoy all the time we have okay!

3-
i know you're stuck in the middle now,
and you arent feeling anything.
feeling acquited maybe.
please please please please please dont.
be proactive and make your own decisions.
i know both decisions are not the best for you.
choose the one that you can relate the most too,
for in the end you want to be able to say
this is the decision i made and not regret it.
grow with the decision that you made.
cos you wanna leave with the thought that.
hey, i grew out of everything.
there'll always be people to support you.
think carefully is all i can tell you.
please do do do do do do.

4-& now backtrack
is it the time factor?
i dont know
to me, it isnt easy.i cant believe i still have to overcome so many things.
i dont want myself to use the method of heck-caring all my feelings
to overcome all these feelings.
what's the point? i dont want to be devoid of feelings.
if people are tired just cos of schoolwork,
whats more me?
count in all the negative factors in my life, please.

people promise me this and that and this and that.
where are the this and that and this and that?
maybe i've broken a few promises here and there.
but you know what? its what you promised me that counts.
if you ask me, i'd say you're a very good liar.

did i let go too early? maybe.
previously, i thought everything was bliss.
as long as i cared enough, im safe, at least thats what i thought.
but after that era, i thought,
no, it takes more than that.
it takes understanding from both sides.
and i've been known for being one of the most demanding people
and one of those that argue right down to the last grain to get what i want.
i think i've already toned down a lot a lot a lot alr.
but i cant seem to make things work.

the factor is not me now,
its you you and you. what have you been doing all this while?
while people tries a million times, what have you been doing?
telling yourself, its alright, i cant do anything about it?
thats being reactive,
so i got to be proactive again?

when you're so reluctant to let go,
you become like me.
when everything goes down for you,
who will you turn to?

when i wake up everyday,
i want to be more than just okay.
so where are you, to help me realise this dream.
hurry up and find me leh!


i cant give up now, but i need you to understand,
im still here, im already screamin' this out.
im still here, you get it?!
the past is never gone, cos you learn from it,
and you improve.

you understand?
1 month is all you got from now on.
if you really care,
and is so goddamn caring that you make yourself out to be,
prove that point to me.
tell me that same few words again.


________________

i'm actually super touched by what someone asked me to do today.
but i totally forgot.
im so sorry :X
yes, super touched.
and and please get well soon, okie?

i learnt this during CME today.
proactive VS reactive.





RED is super sexy, ultra cool and full of burning fire.
im happy that im a patient woman.